Once, a long time ago in a place a few miles away I was in college. For one reason or another a few of us came up with sexually tilted lines in movies. I remember the “Alien” movie for one, which included such Gems as:
1. Spit on it for two minutes, for Christ’s sakes, would you?
2. It’s like a man, it’s Big!
And of course…
“What’s it got down his throat?” which of course referred to the alien face sucker thing that lays an egg in the unfortunate victims stomach, which later bursts out in a spectacularly nasty fashion.
I felt a little like this today, going to the hospital for an EGD. It’s like a colonoscopy, but they run the camera in the entrance instead of the exit. They put me to sleep first, thankfully, with some great drugs. There’s something scary about the fact they can drug you up, do pretty much whatever they want, and then wake you up. Sort of the medical Roofies experience. They could just put you to sleep and go to lunch and bill you $5000.
Anyway, they removed something and poked around, so now I feel a bit sore, like the alien is stirring and is prodding around finding the weakest place to break through. And I slept a lot afterward, which was nice. I seem to be the subject of a video as well. Damn camera phones.
Now I’m going to have to Netflix Alien, and try and remember the rest of those funny lines.